It is three weeks into the new year now and I am BEGINNING to think about New Year's resolutions and life changes. Having just been through chemotherapy I am now a cancer survivor. I was declared NED the first of this year. (No Evidence of Disease.) So after going through all of that plus the holidays, now I'm left with the big question, "What's next?"
Honestly I have lots of anxiety about how my life will be/look like/transpire going forward. I know I've emerged from the cancer journey a bit less inclined to just accept BS, and definitely more guarded of my own time. I also know that I have to been saved for some reason. The big questions of life (what is my purpose, why are we here, how can I leave my mark) loom large for me now, contemplating how fleeting this life could be. I thought maybe the big answers to match would automatically come to me following my ordeal. Unfortunately, it isn't that easy and I'm not going to get off that lightly.
It seems I have work to do. I have to work to clear the detritus of my life to provide a pathway for new things to enter. And that is spiritually, intellectually, physically, etc. It means carving the time out for both contemplation and execution. I'm really good at the contemplating part - it's the execution that is harder of course. What I have to do first is make the lists. What stays? What goes? What would be ideal? Yes, contemplation must come first. Then when the decisions are made, the next step is getting the family "on board" with the "new program." Another BIG challenge, because NO ONE likes change all that much. Finally is the execution of the plan and working toward the goals.
I am hopeful that the contemplations phase will bring to me the ideas I need to honor my cure, respect my body more and provide a path to self'actualization. Hmm tall order, I know. Still, I have been determined in the past and can be again. The journey on the back side of cancer begins with small steps, like every other journey does too.
Happy New Year!
Showing posts with label New Year's resolutions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label New Year's resolutions. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Saturday, January 2, 2010
A Wish and a Prayer
Well today is 1-1-2010. It's that time again. Time to make promises to myself that I fully INTEND to keep, but rapidly fall away from and then feel guilty about for a few weeks. After a month or so, those "resolutions" are but a cobweb of memory. In my family we have a little saying..."for YOU, it's going to be different!" You know, this year, I hope that it WILL be different in so many ways, but history is not on my side so much.
Once or twice a year I fervently scour the PEOPLE magazine issue devoted to folks who have managed to (A) keep their resolutions by (B) dieting down to half their original size. I look at how they did it. Pour over the befores and afters. Scan the comparison charts of diet plans and say to myself, "gee, why couldn't that be ME, too?" This has me wondering why in fact, it hasn't BEEN me that has had this kind of success. There are a wealth of self-help books out there that supposedly can show me the way. I've read many of them, actually. And diet books too. THey all look doable, but not so much fun, you know? All those charts and the counting and introspection. Yikes. I think perhaps this is why those books just don't help. It's too much. And doesn't get to what motivates a person to get off their butt and make a change in their life.
It occurs to me that to have success you have to have a bit of fun with the process. With respect to diet and exercise, I have yet to see a program out there that makes doing exercise or dieting either "fun" in any kind of way. Both are hard work, and finding the motivation to "Just Do It" as the Nike ad proclaims, is difficult, even with compelling reasons to try. (Like health issues, or upcoming family or social events with photos involved). So in order to get the results (for ME, it's going to be different...) I have to think up a way to make the whole thing rather fun and/or interesting. That means that success is a highly personal endeavor and really can't be just taught in a book or diet journal, no matter what the cover art proclaims.
And while I am talking about a major goal of weight loss (don't we all, after the indulgent, cookie-stuffed holidays?), really I think the fun factor applies to any resolution made. I've heard a saying somewhere, the gist of which is "a goal without a plan is just a wish". So my plan is to get to the goal by having fun with it. OK. So the next question is, how in the heck can exercise be fun? Good question. Still working on that one, actually. Dance? Music? Doing it with a friend/commiserator? Maybe all of the above. Who knows? That's the planning part of this. I'm good at planning/organizing. Why not this too?
I have other goals, besides the usual January resolve to FINALLY lose the weight and be in the best shape of my life. Most of these revolve around getting further organized, but I think I'm doing mostly ok on that score. Maybe uncluttered a bit. My bigger ambitions this year are more aligned with lifelong (well, perhaps the last 15 years) goals of writing a book. I have two stories I'm wanting to work on, so I do have a "plan" in some respects. Working on a blog has been a good start to get the fingers moving, and hence, part of that "planning" stage.
So my January is shaping up to be rather full of resolve, some solid planning and thinking up ways to make getting to the goals both interesting (i.e., less "work") and entertaining/fun. Because this year I really don't want my goals to become cobwebs, forgotten in some little-traveled corner. For me, it WILL be different. I may not make the cover of PEOPLE next year after shedding half of myself, but I think I can get closer. And that's all good with me. Happy New Year!
Once or twice a year I fervently scour the PEOPLE magazine issue devoted to folks who have managed to (A) keep their resolutions by (B) dieting down to half their original size. I look at how they did it. Pour over the befores and afters. Scan the comparison charts of diet plans and say to myself, "gee, why couldn't that be ME, too?" This has me wondering why in fact, it hasn't BEEN me that has had this kind of success. There are a wealth of self-help books out there that supposedly can show me the way. I've read many of them, actually. And diet books too. THey all look doable, but not so much fun, you know? All those charts and the counting and introspection. Yikes. I think perhaps this is why those books just don't help. It's too much. And doesn't get to what motivates a person to get off their butt and make a change in their life.
It occurs to me that to have success you have to have a bit of fun with the process. With respect to diet and exercise, I have yet to see a program out there that makes doing exercise or dieting either "fun" in any kind of way. Both are hard work, and finding the motivation to "Just Do It" as the Nike ad proclaims, is difficult, even with compelling reasons to try. (Like health issues, or upcoming family or social events with photos involved). So in order to get the results (for ME, it's going to be different...) I have to think up a way to make the whole thing rather fun and/or interesting. That means that success is a highly personal endeavor and really can't be just taught in a book or diet journal, no matter what the cover art proclaims.
And while I am talking about a major goal of weight loss (don't we all, after the indulgent, cookie-stuffed holidays?), really I think the fun factor applies to any resolution made. I've heard a saying somewhere, the gist of which is "a goal without a plan is just a wish". So my plan is to get to the goal by having fun with it. OK. So the next question is, how in the heck can exercise be fun? Good question. Still working on that one, actually. Dance? Music? Doing it with a friend/commiserator? Maybe all of the above. Who knows? That's the planning part of this. I'm good at planning/organizing. Why not this too?
I have other goals, besides the usual January resolve to FINALLY lose the weight and be in the best shape of my life. Most of these revolve around getting further organized, but I think I'm doing mostly ok on that score. Maybe uncluttered a bit. My bigger ambitions this year are more aligned with lifelong (well, perhaps the last 15 years) goals of writing a book. I have two stories I'm wanting to work on, so I do have a "plan" in some respects. Working on a blog has been a good start to get the fingers moving, and hence, part of that "planning" stage.
So my January is shaping up to be rather full of resolve, some solid planning and thinking up ways to make getting to the goals both interesting (i.e., less "work") and entertaining/fun. Because this year I really don't want my goals to become cobwebs, forgotten in some little-traveled corner. For me, it WILL be different. I may not make the cover of PEOPLE next year after shedding half of myself, but I think I can get closer. And that's all good with me. Happy New Year!
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